Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Yong has left for France. I was weaker than I thought I would be and I miss him more than I thought I would. It has only been 5 days and I'm already feeling this way. Can I pull through for 2 years? Will our relationship still stand strong? Will I still be 'the one' for him after he returns? So many uncertainties. So much insecurities.

Still, I've no regrets setting him free. When I say I feel happy for him, I mean it from the bottom of my heart, although things might not be easy for him to cope in France and life will never be the same for me in this tiny island of Singapore, afterall, he has filled my life for 6 years.

6 years of relationship was not smooth sailing. Looking at the brighter side, this 2 years will be a good opportunity to prove how deep is our love for each other. No promise that everything will turn out good but definitely, an answer will be found.

I appreciate my friends for being there for me. I see their footsteps beside me and realised I'm not alone. They tolerate my mood swings and unexpected tears, mended my heart and soul with their sincere concern and cheerful laughs.

I alwayz believe I'm a fortunate person. God gave me so many wonderful things and my family, boyfriend, and friends, are the greatest gifts.

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Thursday, June 01, 2006

Marriage - "the state of being husband & wife, the relationship between two people who are married." Flip through the dictionary and this is the definition you'll find. But, I've got a new definition for it. Marriage - "another word for butter trade."

Have the society changed or have the perception of humans changed? Marriage is no longer valuable. Research shown that divorce rate in Singapore is shooting sky high and in my personal point of views, below are the main culprits.

Singaporean men and their 'beloved' foreign bride. Why 'beloved'? Because I don't call it love, I call it lust. Majority, I said majority, of foreign brides married Singapore men for the sake of getting a Singapore PR and comfort living while for Singapore men, everyone should have guessed what they want out of this marriage, mind blowing sex. So, this is butter trade.

Singaporean women & Singaporean men. Reason for getting married? Get a flat. That is why you don't hear mushy lovey dovey marriage proposal anymore because the standard sentence is "dear, should we buy a flat?" and "Yes!", both happily get a marriage cert and a love nest. Oops, not love nest, just a roof over their heads. Yes, this is butter trade.

I admit that I'm being cynical and stereotypical here. I seriously have no idea where have all the values gone to? We were taught that marriage is a vow that bonds two people together regardless of sickness, poverty, or death; two people completing each other by providing the tender love and concern they need and sharing the burdens together and, therefore, sastifying each other sexual needs. When both are ready to spread these values, they bear childrens and voila! A happy family. But nope, reality is ironic.

Last week there's 2 people from a certain church came knocking at my door and preached me on values of marriage. I was thinking "what?? you mean these values need to be preached??" Sad case huh.

So now, don't ask me why I did not marry my boyfriend and follow him to France. I don't think it'll do us any good in rushing into marriage and I don't want to be in the list of divorcees.

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